||[29 Aug 2005|02:39pm]
Who is ready to have some fun, eh?
Yours truly stumbled onto a website where Christians morally judge movies for society. This was a riot. I swear, Christians would run around in the Sahara Desert in a black sweatsuit with metal chains and locks around their dicks and V-Holes.
So, what movie do I go and check out?
Shit, I would think that Christians could at least enjoy this movie. It's a movie about neverending love, about being with the person you love, not who you settle for, even if that person and you are from different societies. And maybe it's a little about fucking. But, hey, that's one of the best parts.
(Keep in mind, I have never seen the Notebook, but I have seen enough previews, swooning girls, and crying guys to know what I am talking about.)
So, I figure, why not post some of the reviews...and review them?
Negative - I can't tell you the number of girls that I know who absolutely love this movie because its a love story based on commitment. But honestly its a story about a girl who cheats on her soon to be husband. I think that it truly sends out a terrible message to girls. The woman in this movie has noisy sex with the man Boe in the movie. Then she was like this is great. I mean I don't see the greatness of this movie at all. It sends a horrible message out to young girls. This movie definitely is the opposite of what God has planned for marriage and a dating relationship. My Ratings: [Very Offensive/3]
--Matt, age 21
Matt, Matt, Matt. See, thoughts like this are the reason so many Christians are divorcing (and that's wrong too. Do you not remember that "until death do us part thing"?) She cheats on the soon-to-be-husband because she never loved him as much as she loved that main dude in the movie. I think the thing that pisses me off about this review are the way he says "noisy sex"...what a pussy.
Negative - ...The one I attended had a large number of young girls in the audience, and this is not a movie I would ever think of showing to that age group. The film disguises lust as just another form of love. The two main characters don't even get along, and the movie says so; the only time they get along is when they are making out. Must be true love! Then she goes and finds a decent guy, but cheats on him with the man she "loves". That scene alone made me uncomfortable knowing young girls were watching... After they have sex for the first time, the female lead says "Thats what I have been waiting for? Lets do it again!" I guess the idea of saving it for marriage was lost by her. And it showed the young audience that its not worth waiting for, because well, its fun. (Oh yeah, she was engaged to another man when they had sex, great morals.) "The Notebook" should not be seen by anyone under 17 or 18, that's just on moral grounds, not to mention the nudity and language the film contains... My Ratings: [Very Offensive/2]
--Jonathan Rodriguez, age 20
Man, what do they teach you kids in Bible School. Lust is a part of love. That's what seperates humans from nuns.
Negative - ...typical Hollywood fare: lust, sex, profanity. ...It's not that I didn't like the movie (maybe that's contradictory) but I couldn't help thinking about my three daughters and the message of lust and sex that was promoted in this movie in a positive light and no consequences...There was no need to include the sex scenes in this movie. They added absolutely nothing and ruined what could have been a great family film... My Ratings: [Very Offensive/4]
--Steve, age 51
MAYBE THAT'S CONTRADICTORY?! Of course it's contradictory you hypocritical bastard! You can't condemn something because of it's vices, but then say you enjoyed it! What an idiot. Steve needs to admit that he hates being like this and just wants to see some fucking a hear some dirty words. Join us on the Dark Side, Steve.
Negative - This is the worst movie of the summer, both from a Christian perspective and from a movie perspective. The film has two long, graphic sex scenes and the movie promotes reincarnation. There is also the Lord's name in vain a few times. This movie is boring and offensive. Don't waste your money on it. My Ratings: [Very Offensive/2½ ]
--Steve Allaby, age 24
Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...Steve's never getting laid...
Negative - I'm not sure what movie these people who are rating the movie as positive saw, but this is Hollywood's attempt to portray pre-marital sex as romance (much like Titanic did). No matter how you slice it, it's fornication, and it disturbs me that young girls will swoon over the relationship and see it as romantic vs. immoral. This is exactly how Satan wants Christians to feel about it. This is how he works on us, little by little, just making us a little more tolerant of immorality. Remember, in the end times, wrong will seem right. Sorry folks, the movie had a shot at being a love story, but ends up as a lust story. As a Christian, I can't recommend it and will not allow my two young teenage daughters to see it. My Ratings: [Very Offensive/4]
--Brent, age 40
Well, then let's hear it for the endtimes! I agree, Titanic was a bad movie (at least until the shit starts to hit the fan). I like how you can almost assume that Brent thinks Satan directed this movie. This can't be true, as Satan is busy wrapping up Gigli Pt. Deux.
Negative - Too much sex!! I was embarrassed to see it with my 15 year old daughter. My Ratings: [Average/4]
--Arlene Collins, age 41
And I suppose your daughter just congealed in a gutter? You had sex to have your daughter. Jesus.
Negative - Viewer beware! The pre-marital sex scenes and talk about the sex act are very explicit. PG-13 means absolutely nothing. I am disappointed that Christian reviewers gloss over this. I'm sure Jesus is blushing. Many 15 and under children were watching the movie. My teens will not be joining their friends for this misrepresented film. My Ratings: [Very Offensive/2]
--Cathie Hill, age 49
Your kids are gonna grow up to hate you and you are going to die alone. Oh, and Jesus thought this movie got hosed at the Acadamy Awards.
Next! How about one from a kid!?
Negative - ...I went with my girl friend and was pretty embarrassed to be watching a lot of sex. Obviously they were mixing lust with love. Love can exist without sex, and sex can, in fact, exist when there is absolutely no love. I was embarrassed to say the least and did not enjoy it. My girlfriend did enjoy it, and that’s ok, she took it as a very emotional film and probably thinks I thought it was cheesy. Not cheesy, but very misleading. It is misleading because sex before marriage is wrong. There is no Scripture that talks about, "Well if you really love that person, then it's ok" "If you stay with them forever, then it's ok." No verse!
I hope all those, that think this movie was just about love, think twice before seeking a fiery relationship. Just like every other time it will destroy you. The Bible makes it very clear in proverbs! It will destroy you! My Ratings: [Very Offensive/3]
--David, age 16
Put down the Bible, David. You think that having pre-marital sex will "DESTROY YOU!"? Try lasting without sex until the age of 36, just like you are going to have to. That's gonna destroy you!
TIME FOR A BIG ONE!!!
Negative - Even taking Christian morales aside this move is reduced to nothing more than a typical "lust" story, honestly, and I mean lust not love. Whereas it does accent the consequences of ungodly acts such as premarital sex and placing ones love in somebody as their heart and soul rather than the emphasis of the love for Christ. (Love the Lord, your God with all your mind, heart and soul.) It ultimately falls short by being way to simplistic, horrible dialogue and reflects the ignorance of worldly love.
The saddest part of the movie is that their relationship is not Christ-centered. The power of their love is highly selfish and motivated towards fulfilling the fleshly desires of one another. "This is what I have been missing out in" is one of the phrases Ally makes after they have intercourse. Repulsed by the sleeziness and false image of love this movie and novel portrays I must say its a real downer; utilizing the visade of elderly age to justify that because their so called love is lasting and sweet does the true and everlasting love of Christ no justice.
The mise-en-scene, is over the top and unrealistic and the conclusion of the film, of them being together, that through love they can accomplish anything is way to idealistic and dangerous; as scripturally speaking, the following is mentioned: oh about the love lasting forever after death thing, that is true but the intimacy will be more focused on Christ. It's rather the human marriage bond that will end. The only thing I was trying to make clear is that scripturally speaking after death, people are no longer married; it's not a mere marriage vow. Matthew 22:30; I apologize for not making it clear... love may be lasting, the notion of not remembering earthly relationships is absurd, however Jesus said that the institution of human marriage would end, having fulfilled its purpose to anticipate and reflect the marriage of Christ and his bride (Ephesians 5:23-32). He did not say nor imply that the deep relationships built between married couples would end.
Don't let your emotions get the best of you and let your ideas of love become corrupted by this worldly carnal view. This was by no means a great film, nor a very good one because it promotes and makes an general acceptance of this kind of immoral behavior. The sad thing is that such relationships run rampant in our world, and are englufed in a void of emptiness. My Ratings: [Average/2]
--Matthew, age 20
OK, I think that Jesus was an awesome dude. He spoke the truth. Him and Martin Luther King, Jr. are my two favorite people when it comes to peace talk. But, holy shit, this guy is putting Jesus ahead of his partner when it comes to love. OK, you try marrying a girl and then give Jesus more attention than her. You won't last past 3 months.
Well, this was fun, but just to show that all Christians aren't crazy, here is someone who posted a "Positive";
Positive - ...a really good movie! My Ratings: [Better than Average/4]
--Molly, age 13
Thank you, Molly.